Big +1000 to this. I had to learn the hard way when I was younger, real friends don’t take advantage of you no matter what it is. But it is possible that you have genuine friends that are just a bit dumb and didn’t really think about what they were doing - so don’t pitch a hissy, just explain what everybody has said above.
Another alternative, if you aren’t up to the direct confrontation, is to put up a sign with a basket or coffee can below it asking for donations to cover the cost of the ingredients.
You sign could read something like:
“I’m glad you love my beer. Please feel free to donate to the cause since brewing all this great beer is costly and takes a ton of my time. I can always use some extra hands on brew day to help with all the cleanup if you are up to it! Thanks!”
Just an alternative approach but it gets the message across.
as someone mentioned previously, asking for money like that could (though not likely) get you in trouble. it could be interpreted by the revenooers as ‘selling’ your homebrew.
That was why I put “donation” in there as well as gave the time alternative. But I’m not a lawyer so I have no idea if that would really cover it.
I think anything money related and attached to the beer, could be considered alcohol purchase. Call it a movie fund to help pay for DVD’s that guests might watch or a college fund for the kids. The biggest problem, is if you happen to piss off one of them. The wrong phone call could make for a very unpleasant experience.
Blah. I’d just take the direct confrontation route if I had to worry about a knock on the door because I asked people to help donate to purchasing supplies.
Oh well, always a good discussion.
Wow Weaze. Sounds like it’s time for some blunt and to the point eastern conversation with these people. I share my beer with friends and even brew beer for people’s parties. They pay for the ingredients and I brew the beer.
None of my friends have ever just shown up at my house and helped themselves let alone blow the keg. I would be really pissed at that. Not really the beer, but like Denny and others have said - the time and effort to make beer. That’s just rude IMO. Would they just walk into a bar and help themselves to beer or even someone’s house and just drink their last beer in the fridge?
Guess I don’t ever have to worry about moving to Idaho.
What puts me in a bind, is I know these dudes aren’t just abusing me. Two of them are my bros-in-law. Two others, I’ve know since I first moved here. I mean, anytime they came over before, for poker night, whatever, everybody bought a 6, tossed it in the fridge, and every man for himself. We took that fishing trip together, everyone bought a ase, tossed it in the cooler, and then take what you want. That’s just how these guys roll. It’s how they were raised I guess. And, it’s not like they just started hanging around since I had beer on tap. Like I said, I’ve know some for 10+ years. And, to be fair, I have to say, if rolls were reversed, they would think nothing of it, if I were to show up at their house for a growler.
But, that’s not me. That’s not my background. That’s not how I do it. My mancave, my beer, my rules. So, What I have decided, is the kind, subtle approach. So as to avoid looking like a douch bag to them (like I said, they would not think twice if I filled up from their tap) I have my little piggy bank that say “Beer Money” I will be sure that ison display right between the two taps. Along with that, I will make a little sign that says “To keep the taps flowing, a couple bucks go a long ways.” I’ll just put it out certain times, poker night, bbq’s, etc…I don’t want them to get the impression that every time they pull a pint, I expect a donation. Just for those times I know it’s gonna be hit hard. I’ll try that for a while, and see how it goes.
Very nice thread. Great discussion.
Here in my little corner of Washington State, I’ve had to refuse money for my beer. But, I have received many LHBS gift certificates as “happy Monday” gifts.
Weaze, this is why I think you need to be direct. Like: “Remember before I started brewing here, when we would all bring beer and throw it all together and just grab what we wanted? It’s like that now, except I’m the only one supplying any beer. So I need you guys to either pony up for some ingredients or help out cleaning and brewing.”
The tip jar might work, but it seems a bit passive-aggressive to me, especially since you know these guys well. And institute a rule - you kick a keg, you clean two. 
Something about “you kick a keg, you clean two” sounds more aggressive than a tip jar to me. Besides, while help may be nice, money would be better.
Aggressive is fine with me. :) But I see it as more humorous than aggressive, like a game of hot potato. It all depends on how it’s presented.
Me, I’d rather have the help than the money. It doesn’t cost much money to brew a batch of beer, but the time it takes away from other things I need to do is more of a problem.
Agree with you about the time, but perversely I find that when I brew with others - it takes me longer than if I’m in heads down focused brewing mode.
And if it’s one of my good friends bringing something like The Bruery’s White Oak to drink, then the day gets dramatically longer. 
I agree. I’d much rather brew by myself. Distractions are what cause me to make mistakes.
Yeah, I could use the help on a cleaning day, but not on a brewing day. Or they could mow my lawn, weed the ditch, prune the apple tree, pick up dog poo, clean the gutters, remove/treat the moss on the roof of the shed, power wash the driveway, wash and seal the concrete slab, wash and seal the deck, paint the pergola, build an arbor for the grapes, put in posts and wires for the other grapes, paint the fence, paint the house, replace the windows, cut down the maples that lost their tops in the last wind storm, fix my chipper/shredder, clean out the pile of stuff to be chipped/shredded, take a load of debris to the dump, help me take everything out of the garage and seal any holes where mice might be coming in then put everything back, build two benches, build a picnic table, and build a chicken coop. ;D
But it’s easier to just come steal your beer when you’re working.
Yeah, I really don’t care about having help. I brew because I enjoy it. And for me, it’s one of those things where an extra hand just gets in the way. Kind of like holding the trash door open for someone at McDonalds. No one really needs this done for them, but we end up doing it because it seems polite. But, in the end, they just end up dumping half the trash on the floor, and you end up with ketchup on your wrist, and lettuce on your shoe. It would have been better just to walk away.
I really could use the money. When I had real work, and was brewing mainly for myself, it was not an issue. But, now that work has changed (and I’m not complaining, it’s my choice. I love my life now) and I seem to be brewing for half the town, money is what I need. If you wanna come brew with me, fine. Just bring your checkbook!! ;D
And leave your pants at home? 
Neither help nor money will give YOU more time to allocate to brewdays. I think you just need to tell them that you aren’t able to brew enough to supply the whole neighborhood with beer. Nothing personal to any of them, just the truth.