Man, there are days when I love being a homebrewer. Had some workers over at the house today and had to vacate the office.
So, work from the garage it is!
And of course, while I’m there without food, I might as well have a beer or two! 
This sustained me through my ordeal.
Tempting Fate, my Russian River Temptation inspired brew.
sounds good, but…
you said “After 6 months, taste the beer, if there’s enough “funkiness” for you, add the oak beans (sans wine) and age for 2 to 4 weeks and then package. Your beer should be at a low terminal gravity (around 1.008) to prevent bottle bombs. Carbonate highly and enjoy.”
what if there’s not enough ‘funkiness’? then, what?
Then wait… duh.
that easy,huh? 
Hey, Drew. Could you do a turbid mash instead of adding more food in the secondary? I’m not sure what flavor changes it would cause, if any. I’m just looking for a reason to do one…
But congrats on finding a way to drink on the job! Are you going to have them work on the house indefinitely? ;D
Why in the world would you soak your beans in Chardonnay for six months and then throw out the wine?! So much of your oak flavor is in that wine you know. Beans give up their flavor in about 6-8 weeks, so for one thing theres no reason to soak longer than that and for another if you don’t want as much oak flavor in the beer then just add fewer beans and a shot of Chard.
Otherwise I fine sounding brew, I have a Flanders red in a wine barrel that is pretty darned tasty.
Because the initial oak flavoring that comes out of the beans is terrible.
There’s a reason so much of the experimentation that we see done is with used oak barrels. Aging the beans is replicating the character of a used barrel. I’ve got oak beans that have been aging since 2003 in bourbon, wine cubes that are going on 3 years now. There is a method to the madness because the oak character I get from the soaked beans is more in line with what I taste from the better barrel aged beers with softer, subtler tone than “here’s a 2x4… enjoy”
Sure, but I’m lazy that way! Also, this is a technique that I picked up from MB Raines when she taught me her way of doing lambics. And I wish I could work at home all the time, but my liver is thankful I can’t!