Honestly, I took one look at the wall of poorly formatted text and didn’t attempt to read it.
Good point.
Try reformatting the text to make it more reader friendly, and you will attract more readers.
The reasons for hiring a professional seem to be adding up! 
If you want to emphasize the big of big bug, you might consider putting a really small pint glass next to the bug.
Sorry you feel everyone is being overly negative, but you did ask for honest feedback. People do want breweries to succeed, and the feedback you are getting is to push you in the right direction. They are not trying to discourage you, they are trying to point out where they think you need to improve. It is possible that you can still be successful with a logo that some people don’t like, with a story that some perceive as poorly written and somewhat nonsensical, or a website some view as unattractive. There is a lot of good beer in the market, so you need to consider every thing you can do to help yourself. Or not.
That was my first reaction. But then I read the comments about it and forced myself to trudge through it. Basically, it’s a nickname of the co-owner. There. Much simpler.
Russian River has some of the worst labels. I still fly across the country to buy their beer. 
Hard to make bad beer? You mean people are trying to make some of this crap?
Sorry, OP, I know you are wanting to turn this back to topic. I’ve given my .02. I don’t think the first one is too bad, and while I agree that people like a story I don’t think it is too terribly important, as long as the beer is good. You story can always change, it’s business not journalism.
BTW: Someone mentioned Russian River labels. I like their labels, I like how the Belgian styles look hand drawn and they are obviously trying to look like some of the hand drawn Belgian lable.s.
OP - I’m sorry I hated all of them. I didn’t realize that wasn’t an option. If I really didn’t care about you or your brewery, I wouldn’t bother to give my opinion. If you want everyone to tell you how great you are, just keeping making beer in your garage and giving it to your friends.
Once you “go pro” people expect a lot from you, and you become a target for completely untempered criticism. Whether that’s fair or not doesn’t matter.
Exactly. There’s no reason to shoot yourself in the foot before you even open the door. IMO a great website won’t “fix” a bad brewery, but bad marketing has sunk many breweries that made great beer.
I thought I wandered into a thread about Dogfish Head for a second… ;D
This becomes more true as we have more options on the shelf. If I’m blindly trying something new, I’m probably not going to pick a six pack that has a clip art logo.
Spend some time thinking about your brand. Is there significance behind the “Big Bug” name or is it just ‘catchy’ alliteration? Your brand should give me a glimpse of your motivations to brew beer, and should be created in the same style you create beers. Clip Art logo says ‘Copy-and-Paste beer’.
I’m no artist either. I can conceptualize, construct, and produce a beer, but I don’t even know where to start on a logo. If you know an artist (even a really poor one), fill them full of your beer and have them sketch you out something. Tattoo artists are especially good at creating art out of ideas, experiences, and interaction with the customer.
Don’t overlook the possibility of people claiming that you are trying to target youth. They did it with a tobacco company because they had a cartoon camel
“Friends don’t let friends drink bad beer”
Although internal documents from that tobacco company showed that they were targeting youth.
Step 1) Make a gibberish brand name
Step 2) Make beer that’s as good Dogfish Head’s
Step 3) ??
Step 4) Profit!
PS - “The brewery takes its name from Dogfish Head, Maine where founder Sam Calagione spent summers as a child.”
It doesn’t make it a great name, but that is a very simple, succinct, and easy to understand story.
I agree it’s not a good name, and that it’s not a great backstory, but it’s slightly better than the OP’s. I actually didn’t know where it came from before I looked it up, but I had just assumed it was the name of somewhere in Delaware.
Can I just keep making good beer instead? Or do I have to bitter it with the saliva of an endangered South American lizard?
At any rate, my point was that branding that’s totally unrelated to beer doesn’t preclude success in this industry.
Yes, sometimes brands succeed despite bad marketing, but brands never succeed because of bad marketing.
One of the most successful restaurateurs in Denver had about a 5-year timescale for each venue. It’d open, get a lot of business because it’s the hip new thing, ride that until it’s not as profitable anymore, shut down, remodel the space, and open a new restaurant with a different concept.
So even if your marketing is bad now, you can always rebrand later, assuming you don’t go out of business in the meantime.
A guy who runs several bars (at a time) explained that exact business plan to me one evening. He would remodel a bar, do an intensive ad campaign and be open for 4 to 6 months. 3 months to recoop cost and 1 to 4 months profit depending on business. Then close it, remodel it and repeat. He typically had 6 to 10 bars open at any given time and was making a 7 figure/year income.
Paul